It's not you, it's me.

How blind have I become? How deaf, tasteless, touchless and blind? Thousands and thousands of beautiful concepts dancing around my head, supposedly making me see differently. Today this sounds like a placebo. I guess I haven't been taking the real stuff untill now. Reality check me, please.

What about my life untill now?

Has to be something that reeked for a long time on a forgotten corner of my waking life. It smelled bad for long enough before I found it and had to deal with it. A rotten mirror: my personal history. And looking through that mirror I could only see my own smelly rotten self staring back at me. Something horrible, that has been growing, hating and ignoring every achievement. Killing all illusions that would make me feel better. Trapping me inside that terrible place called reality. I'm on both sides this time.

Having discovered that damned thing on my closet, or hidden inside a dirty plate on my kitchen. I looked straight into it, and having no one around to protect, I ended up seeing myself. For a split second, I could watch a wretched organism growing, fighting to remain functional. I took it up, cleaned it, and tried to set me up as nicely as I could.

Who said I couldn't properly care about things that grow?