Learn Japanese [or] Self-fulfilling prophecy [or] Pygmalion Effect
Beliefs that just come true
My way of learning has never been very straightforward, which is to say that I'm mostly self-taught. Not that I don't learn from teachers, quite the opposite actually. By not depending on someone's help to accomplish the task, that help is much more appreciated whenever it's available.
The Pygmalion effect, as I've learned to call it, is more commonly known as a self-fulfilling prophecy. Simply put, if you expect something to happens, it probably will. Now, if you step in front of a moving truck expecting magically absorb the momentum and turn into Iron Man, well... you're just an idiot.
I'm comfortable talking about this because I've experienced it first-hand from several perspectives. If you need academic sources, try the links on Wikipedia and you might run into some credible sources or not. I'm writing from my experience here: being a student, being a teacher and getting girls.
Being a Student
One of my best examples of this happened in high school, probably in my junior year. There was a "writing teacher", and I had never ever thought of myself as someone who could produce something interesting. I mean, I was in high school!
So, I can't really attest to the sanity of this one particular teacher. I don't remember her name, but I do remember she could speak Greek. Other than that, she seemed to be no more than a slightly chubby boring teacher. Except that she believe in me. For some weird reason, she took a liking on the weird boy from the worst class in school.
She would read through my texts in class, before everyone else's, and then tell me what to fix right then and there. Of course, she didn't ask me to do it again, she demanded. I remember having mixed feelings about this when it first happened. I hated having extra homework, but I loved the extra attention. In her eyes, I was a person, almost a respectable human being.
I'm serious here. Stop for a second and think about the people you're connected with. Do you really treat them like people? The worst case scenario is any kind of government agency: for the government NONE of us are actual human beings, but rather we're numbers, statistics and taxpayers.
For some reason, Mrs. Chubby Teacher knew that I could do better than what I was doing. The extra attention she was giving me was but a reflection of that belief. You might not like my writing, but I surely enjoy writing it. This is only me backwards rationalizing on what happened, but I think she somehow understood that I actually cared about doing this. I think that, for her, this was enough for me to make it.
She was probably the first person to actually assign positive value to stuff I was writing. Pretty cool.
Being a Teacher
I've had several years of teaching experience. From that experience, I've seen kids been split in good classes and bad classes over and over again. Not only that, but within any given class we - the teachers - would always know who the best and the worst kids were. We would sit before class and just chat about this or that prank.
Yes, the bad kids get a lot of attention as well. As a teacher, the distance between the average student and the number one student is harder to cover than the distance from last to first. Having the guts to stand out, be it as the best or the worst, is commendable. Follow those guts are the hardest and the most natural thing for a human being to do. An average student has grown used to just humming along, and that makes it harder to "convert" them into great students.
Teaching poor people is also an awesome experience. I remember when I was first thrown into a classroom of "kids" mostly older than me to help them get into college. Life's not easy for these guys, and the mere possibility of having someone come and help means a lot. They were some of the most motivated people I've ever worked with, even though their skills were lacking.
I don't wanna start with the dramatic tale of me and my kids, so onwards we go.
Basically, I believe that the learning process is something very complex and that is affected by so many factors one can hardly keep track. Think about it: rich kid that pays no attention to class in order to look cooler [versus] poor kid hungry with a headache and a hurting hand that was hit by his father. So much comes into play, and the teacher has a major role in making a difference.
Moreover, what the teacher thinks plays a major role.
Getting Girls
I've tried this one myself countless times, and it's crazy. When you're interested in any given girl, the way she sees you and reacts to you depends drastically on what you expect.
Do you expect her to fall in love with you? Do you expect her to walk out on you as if you were a homeless person begging for a penny?
The purpose of this example is to take that ultimately simple and intense moment and think about it. Imagine yourself talking to a girl that you KNOW will fall in love with you. Seriously, do it. Are you relaxed? Do you look happy? How's your body language? Now do the same exercise, but with the latter example: you expect her to run from you like from a homeless beggar. Relaxed? Happy? Body language?
The point of this comparison is: whatever expectations you have, they are being broadcast and they matter.
As a bonus, now you know what to do when you want to get laid: expect to get laid. Act as if it
was gonna happen, because it eventually will.
Learn Japanese
Well, there is almost a culture about how hard it is to learn Japanese. If someone asks, yes, I speak Japanese. Now, I have been frowned upon by foreigners simply by saying that "Japanese is OK", or that "it isn't a problem". I mean, does the fact that some foreigner learned Japanese destroys your whole belief system? Does that belief system tells you learning Japanese is a nearly-impossible task?
Time to change those beliefs. Why? Because they're getting in your way.
There are two bad habits that I would like to point out. First, is the fact that Japanese people were apparently taught to look for and compliment even the silliest accomplishments. I don't think this is a bad thing, but a free compliment shouldn't really reflect on how good you feel about your language prowess. Second, in your daily life (in Japan) you are bombarded with learning opportunities, but you miss it because "not even Japanese people know that". Now, it's fine to not be too harsh on yourself when you're learning, but that's slacking off.
For the former case, I just mean to say: don't congratulate yourself too much. Compliments serve no purpose whatsoever. For the latter, don't let those opportunities pass by. Grab them by the tail and force them into your head.
This is just a quick sketch of why and how to behave like a student. You also wanna watch out for the teachers.
A teacher that is always thinking of what he's teaching as terribly hard or as beyond his student's capacity won't be too much of a teacher, and you wanna take care. I think this is where those stories of people studying for 10-15 years and gaining but a superficial knowledge.
Languages are a special case because everybody has what it takes to learn languages, if you put enough time. And Japanese is taken to be really hard to learn, but isn't it still possible? I mean, how many people took language classes and then completely forgot about it. Learning, then forgetting again and then learning again... it's just a process that adds depth to what's been learned.
It doesn't matter how hard it is. If you're studying Japanese with the belief that you will never be fluent, that's a self-fulfilling prophecy.
My way of learning has never been very straightforward, which is to say that I'm mostly self-taught. Not that I don't learn from teachers, quite the opposite actually. By not depending on someone's help to accomplish the task, that help is much more appreciated whenever it's available.
The Pygmalion effect, as I've learned to call it, is more commonly known as a self-fulfilling prophecy. Simply put, if you expect something to happens, it probably will. Now, if you step in front of a moving truck expecting magically absorb the momentum and turn into Iron Man, well... you're just an idiot.
I'm comfortable talking about this because I've experienced it first-hand from several perspectives. If you need academic sources, try the links on Wikipedia and you might run into some credible sources or not. I'm writing from my experience here: being a student, being a teacher and getting girls.
Being a Student
One of my best examples of this happened in high school, probably in my junior year. There was a "writing teacher", and I had never ever thought of myself as someone who could produce something interesting. I mean, I was in high school!
She would read through my texts in class, before everyone else's, and then tell me what to fix right then and there. Of course, she didn't ask me to do it again, she demanded. I remember having mixed feelings about this when it first happened. I hated having extra homework, but I loved the extra attention. In her eyes, I was a person, almost a respectable human being.
I'm serious here. Stop for a second and think about the people you're connected with. Do you really treat them like people? The worst case scenario is any kind of government agency: for the government NONE of us are actual human beings, but rather we're numbers, statistics and taxpayers.
For some reason, Mrs. Chubby Teacher knew that I could do better than what I was doing. The extra attention she was giving me was but a reflection of that belief. You might not like my writing, but I surely enjoy writing it. This is only me backwards rationalizing on what happened, but I think she somehow understood that I actually cared about doing this. I think that, for her, this was enough for me to make it.
She was probably the first person to actually assign positive value to stuff I was writing. Pretty cool.
Being a Teacher
I've had several years of teaching experience. From that experience, I've seen kids been split in good classes and bad classes over and over again. Not only that, but within any given class we - the teachers - would always know who the best and the worst kids were. We would sit before class and just chat about this or that prank.
Yes, the bad kids get a lot of attention as well. As a teacher, the distance between the average student and the number one student is harder to cover than the distance from last to first. Having the guts to stand out, be it as the best or the worst, is commendable. Follow those guts are the hardest and the most natural thing for a human being to do. An average student has grown used to just humming along, and that makes it harder to "convert" them into great students.
Teaching poor people is also an awesome experience. I remember when I was first thrown into a classroom of "kids" mostly older than me to help them get into college. Life's not easy for these guys, and the mere possibility of having someone come and help means a lot. They were some of the most motivated people I've ever worked with, even though their skills were lacking.
I don't wanna start with the dramatic tale of me and my kids, so onwards we go.
Basically, I believe that the learning process is something very complex and that is affected by so many factors one can hardly keep track. Think about it: rich kid that pays no attention to class in order to look cooler [versus] poor kid hungry with a headache and a hurting hand that was hit by his father. So much comes into play, and the teacher has a major role in making a difference.
Moreover, what the teacher thinks plays a major role.
Getting Girls
I've tried this one myself countless times, and it's crazy. When you're interested in any given girl, the way she sees you and reacts to you depends drastically on what you expect.
Do you expect her to fall in love with you? Do you expect her to walk out on you as if you were a homeless person begging for a penny?
The purpose of this example is to take that ultimately simple and intense moment and think about it. Imagine yourself talking to a girl that you KNOW will fall in love with you. Seriously, do it. Are you relaxed? Do you look happy? How's your body language? Now do the same exercise, but with the latter example: you expect her to run from you like from a homeless beggar. Relaxed? Happy? Body language?
The point of this comparison is: whatever expectations you have, they are being broadcast and they matter.
As a bonus, now you know what to do when you want to get laid: expect to get laid. Act as if it
was gonna happen, because it eventually will.
WTF did those Japanese do to Doctor Who!?
Learn Japanese
Well, there is almost a culture about how hard it is to learn Japanese. If someone asks, yes, I speak Japanese. Now, I have been frowned upon by foreigners simply by saying that "Japanese is OK", or that "it isn't a problem". I mean, does the fact that some foreigner learned Japanese destroys your whole belief system? Does that belief system tells you learning Japanese is a nearly-impossible task?
Time to change those beliefs. Why? Because they're getting in your way.
There are two bad habits that I would like to point out. First, is the fact that Japanese people were apparently taught to look for and compliment even the silliest accomplishments. I don't think this is a bad thing, but a free compliment shouldn't really reflect on how good you feel about your language prowess. Second, in your daily life (in Japan) you are bombarded with learning opportunities, but you miss it because "not even Japanese people know that". Now, it's fine to not be too harsh on yourself when you're learning, but that's slacking off.
For the former case, I just mean to say: don't congratulate yourself too much. Compliments serve no purpose whatsoever. For the latter, don't let those opportunities pass by. Grab them by the tail and force them into your head.
This is just a quick sketch of why and how to behave like a student. You also wanna watch out for the teachers.
A teacher that is always thinking of what he's teaching as terribly hard or as beyond his student's capacity won't be too much of a teacher, and you wanna take care. I think this is where those stories of people studying for 10-15 years and gaining but a superficial knowledge.
Languages are a special case because everybody has what it takes to learn languages, if you put enough time. And Japanese is taken to be really hard to learn, but isn't it still possible? I mean, how many people took language classes and then completely forgot about it. Learning, then forgetting again and then learning again... it's just a process that adds depth to what's been learned.
It doesn't matter how hard it is. If you're studying Japanese with the belief that you will never be fluent, that's a self-fulfilling prophecy.
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